Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
Okay well someone asked "IS HE HOMELESS?" about me so I need to try and find somebody.
I let a guy with dreads drive my car, then demanded he take me back cause I don't let strangers drive my car, while repeatedly apologizing for being a cock block.
I told him I had AIDS after he bit me. His dad cried. I think I just ruined the little guy's 3rd birthday, but he had in coming.
i wondered why i had so many splinters in my hand, then i went out to my car and remembered id stolen an entire cactus
But the guy you're fucking should not be within ten pounds of your weight when you're five fucking feet tall and he's 6'2". That's all I'm saying.
Just saw a dude dressed as captain america driving down the highway. He saluted me.
Girl re-adjusts bra, no one bats an eye. I re-adjust nuts, everyone stares.
I just googled "can they trace a vibrator back to you" so that' s how my life it going.
im buying my prof a giftcard to the state store bc he talked ab crying into a glass of tequila so he deserves it
Now i know i wasnt that drunk... So why are there texts of me volunteering for a nude photo shoot for an art major student?
Someone wrote "LazerSwords" on my cock last night. My erect cock. Tequila is no one's friend.
I quit doing blow for him. If that doesn’t say “I’m in love with you and want to marry you” idk what does
Let’s be real here. NOTHING says Real Adulting like rolling a J on your line of credit paperwork.
Randomize