I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
on the list of things id be doing when i was almost 30, waiting for a girl to finish shitting the bed wasn't on there.
Turned in a paper today on drug abuse. Chose to write about percocet. Just realized I started 2 sentences with "This amazing drug"
So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
i just got cockblocked by a guy drinking wine straight out of the bottle with a straw...
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
He just tried to eat my hair and he keeps talking about pissing on everything, come home soon I beg of you
He held the beaver pelt from the fireplace over my crotch and asked his friend "she look familiar now?", he then remembered my name.
SURVIVAL MODE. WE CAN DO THIS. Celebratory survived-working-christmas-retail sex to follow
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.
So stoned that I pressed the unlock button on my car keys to walk into my bedroom...
He left stubble rash on my thighs and cooked me bacon before 9am. I need to lock this down STAT
His idea of a night out is drinking beer in the driveway. He's been on house arrest too long
I've been sober for almost two weeks and it's been the worst two weeks ever. Even my mom told me I need to start drinking again.
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