new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
just when i thought things couldnt get worse, the batteries died in my vibrator.
walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
She texted me shhh....im drunk, secret booty call...how could i say no?
There's strippers and bear every where so ether you gave me the wrong address or this is the coolest birthday party thrown for a seven year old ever.
U were yelling that I wasn't generous or supportive. Then you kneeled and said this weird prayer about the windows and doors of your life.
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
Found out I slept with someone who likes Pitbull. I really should get to know someone better before I sleep with them.
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
I don't know. She kept pirouetting across the kitchen while making dinner. I just sat there stoned.
My dog got laid yesterday. Some lady came over with her husky to breed. He did it like a champ. I was so proud
Ugh. It's days like these that make me wish my bad habits would kill me faster
like sometimes I wish I was allergic to latex so I wouldn't have sex with so many people..
I miss your drunken presence, and strong odor of hard liquor and potent weed.
We smell like vodka and hangover
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