How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
I just beer bonged a sparks. You better get your ass over here because no one is on my level yet
Every time my boyfriend threatens to commit suicide I change my relationship status as "widowed".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i woke up in the lobby of Holiday Inn on a chair sitting up straight
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
he kept a regular condom in his wallet just so he could comment on how it wouldnt fit before whipping out the magnums. i give him points for the build up
He is in the front yard trying to catch birds out of the air with a fishing net.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How do i tell my boyfriend " I'm taking the two weeks im in Europe to fuck my way across 9 countries" in a way where we will still be together?
You called my nipples compassionate. What does that even mean?
Just trying to get my dicks in a row.
Never play truth or dare with a girl who carries a dildo in her purse. I'll never go to a Denny's again.
As if I wouldn't steal Nintendo brand "Mario is my HOMEBOY!" boxers when he gave me the entire drawer to choose from.
The cat is stealing cigarettes and my vagina cures blindness. How's your night?
Randomize