"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
U just looked at me and said "wake me up when I'm done eating"
i made it my goal to pee in the sink of every apartment we went to last night. i didnt use the toilet once
Hes still not moving. At what point does 'hungover' become 'hospital-time?'
He said in a slur "I go so hard, even when I..." and cut himself off by projectile vomiting all over the ice luge.
I feel like I just rode a horse, did a million jumping jacks, ran a marathon and need a carton on cigarettes. best sex hands down... EVER
There's a fly in my room repeatedly throwing itself at my window, and I feel it's really symbolic of what I want to do with my future
Will u make me a "6 month anniversary of being single" cake??? I wanna celebrate
He left cushions on my floor, chocolate on my bra and unexplained scratches on my thighs. I think this one might get a second date.
After dropping your phone on the ground you got down and sat with it, kissed it and apologized for being so mean
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
It's official. My little brother has had more sex in my car than I have. I'm still tied with my little sister. I hate everybody.
I don't wanna be 33 that's when Jesus died
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