the day after is always just damage control
He came on my face and told me I looked like a gingerbread house.
Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
You are like a prophet. It's amazing how many people you convince to be lesbians.
I'm surrounded by 3 year olds in tutus. They are far too innocent to be within at least 500 ft of me.
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
Also, I'm going to yoga because I have a Taylor Swift range of emotions right now.
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
Shroomed with my best friend'a dad at his wife's surprise birthday party so you can say I have experience in the field
Got so drunk last night I kinda sent a super on point sext to his kid sister...say a prayer man
you gave me money for the cab and then walked home..
just had an allergic reaction to my dildo. My life is ruined.
He made me come so hard I punched another hole in the wall mid orgasm.
I'm not fixing this one for you. Do it your own damn self.
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
Randomize
