Just walked by a group of guys calling out walks of shame with a mega phone from their front porch.
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
Slept in my car last night. It snowed. I peed on the street. Hello 29...
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yeah the little voice in my head screaming YOU NEED TO GET LAID eventually grew legs and started kicking me so to avoid brain damage i had to fuck him
Revised rule: don't put your dick in the general vacinity of mental instability.
Not even dry humping. Not even a little bit.
After he came, I wiped my mouth on my baby blanket. I could feel nana rolling over in her grave.
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
I'd like to believe that in some alternate universe we are living this wonderful lesbian life together..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I tried to twerk on a barn in 3 inch heels at a party last night and nose dived into mud. These were all new friends. I'm probably not allowed back. Cool.
I told him he was like my favorite pair of jeans; I may not wear them every day, but I'll never get rid of them and they make my ass look fantastic. Needless to say he was not thrilled.
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
All I've had to eat today are potatoes...and by that I mean vodka and chips
Twist bend and done? Jesus that sounds like a seventh grade hand job.
We both shit in the same closet in Santa Fe. Nothing is sacred anymore.
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