ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
do you know why "how to shave your balls" is bookmarked on my computer?
Someone left a shot of disaronno in a champagne glass here this morning... flip a coin?
I'm still amazed at how you managed to puke in every plant on the whole top floor at the mall without a single person noticing and without missing a step.
Do you how many people I've successfully loaded into a Mazda Miata? Six. Six people. How? Strategically.
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
This may be hard to believe, but that wasn't the first time I was fingered under a snuggie
It's not
We'll find out our level of friendship after tonight. You'll be helping me move a body. My body.
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
Ok there's 63 pics of you jerking it on my camera from New Years. The time stamps say it took you 40 min to get there too. See a doc, your only 22.
Her instagram is literally selfies, cats, and guys she's fucked.
I had fresh baked oatmeal cookies, tacos AND was on deck to give a stellar blow job. You'd think that'd be a win/win/win situation.
Few clarical questions about last night: 1. How did we get home? 2. Am I wearing your underwear? 3. Where is Andrea? 4. Guy with nose ring last night hot?
1. You tried hitch hiking "like a pro" and flashed cars while sticking out your thumb until I called Michael. 2. I don't know but probably. 3. Who is Andrea? 4. Hot.
lord you gonna make me abandon my soup for tasteful catboy nudes
Randomize
