I've replaced the bottom of the food pyramid with alcohol.
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
The only thing that makes me want to stop the affair is that I am the Monica Lewinksy in this triangle.
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK FUCKABLE IN AN ALL NEON SPANDEX JUMPSUIT?
his eyes are fucked up, he bumped into the cabinet while standing in my office, and he's pounding chicken soup, and he must have chewed on 8 pieces of gum before he got here.
For the first time in my life, I paid for my own alcoholic beverage last night. Am I getting ugly?
To be honest, kinda.
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
I think that the winner of this years fantasy football league should get naming rights to you child
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
I just peed behind the dumpster and dedicated it to you. Can i call u?
In 30 minutes I will have been sober for an entire month. Time for a celebratory lap of cheap alcohol that leads to early liver failure.
But happy liver failure. That's what counts.
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
My boss want to throw me an everclear birthday.
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
Is there a subtle way to tell him he needs to hydrate? 8 years of yoga and kegels. He has no idea what I’m going to do to him this weekend
Randomize
