Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
I just won Halloween Walk of Shame Bingo!
please come get me his dick is out. i'm sitting on his couch and his dick is out. come now
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
It's almost like he dry humped the last remaining bit of good person out of me.
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
Just don't let me fall on anything that can be broken. Unless its a dick
My teacher just let our class out 30 minutes early, its a 50 minute class. He said the only thing we had to do was get fucked up tonight and have stories about it on Monday.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Send me a pic of your kids to remind me why I have morals.
You sent 2 glasses of water to the table next us and told to the waitress they were on you. I repeat: water
I can't wait til me and pit bull can just be together
There are condoms rolled onto each bunny ear of the ears I was wearing last night
For 15 minutes straight, he literally did every accent there was, from Russian to Bostonian. The issue: no one could determine whether he was sober, wasted, or anywhere in between
And I’m prepared, because I'm in it to win it (and by win I mean get railed hard)
Randomize