Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
I'm so turned on right now it's fucking stupid. I hate burger king commercials
a pedometer??? no beatles?Steve jobs just took a dump in CA and it landed on my heart
"Hung over, tired and having a faint scent of some body butter and random pieces of glitter from a girl named gigi, almost arrested in drug bust, $40 Canadian in my pocket and all i got was this lousy Tshirt" shirts dont exist, but they need to
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
My parents got me a bottle of vodka and a puke bucket for christmas. I've already used both.
Why must everything this weekend have to do with something going into or coming out of my vagina?
You grabbed the hot guy that was making out with his girlfriend all night, slurred "I need to borrow this" then shoved your hand down his pants. All because you thought your ex walked into the bar. It was majestic in its shitshowness.
Did you put candle wax on my balls last night?
All I know for sure is, I went to bed drunk and I woke up in a relationship..I think I need to reevaluate my drinking skills.
We have had more Sex in the past 48 hours then we have in the past 3 months. I think it was from me dressing up as Darth Vader.
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
got laid for being an eagle scout again. 4 more and ill have all my merit badges.
I'd rather plunge my eyes out than acknowledge being related to either of my brothers
Randomize
