So I said to her: one time i broke my dick and when they took off the cast i could cum across a baseball field
I do no wrong. I am always right. Right? I forget why I am sending this. It seemed relevant.
Strippers tramp stamp says "mom"
So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i wish there was a photo editing effect that fully opened my drunk eyes
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
oh don't forget that when we go furniture shopping we have to find a matching bong so put more money in the furniture fund
Never backflip into an above ground pool. I think the gash will be smaller by Monday though.
Just made a drunk dude do 20 push-ups. In the parking lot of the bar tonight for a keystone light I found in the back of my truck.
Oh yum
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
I spent $31 at mcdonalds last night. Threw my nuggets all over the yard, ate them out of the snow, picked a fight about it, vomited, then passed out.
Naked.
HE ASKED IF I HAD SIBLINGS WHEN I ASKED HIM TO LICK MY ASSHOLE
It's only ok to pee out the window in the afternoon when you're drunk.
I know this sounds fake but she's deep frying a bar of soap right now
Come fucking get her
There's a fuckload of syrup all over the floor.
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