yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
It's a beautiful day for a hangover
the only reason i invite her is so when the guys start to hit on her i know it's time to take their keys
it's great music for shaving your balls
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
Best compliment ever: Being told that you really understand sex by a professional. After she gave you a HANDJOB.
Don't talk to me about lonely until you're eating marshmallows for dinner in your underwear watching House of Cards for 12 hours straight. I hate all you couples
Naked. naked and bneed help.
GDI YOU HAVE THE GOD OF FUCKING THUNDER'S NUDES AND YOU DIDN'T SHARE
I just fucked her in the corner of an ally while holding a large pizza waiting on a pledge for a ride.
Checking my Tinder matches as I sit here in the waiting room at Planned Parenthood. I can't be stopped.
i have nothing going on in my life. unless a toxic love triangle with netflix and jack daniels counts.
I also fell asleep on the side of a tree so like I hit my lowest point there but it was a good time
Not as bad as when you were sitting in the pond getting fed water
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
The fact he has had a girlfriend for 5 years and they are trying to work it out isn’t going to stop me from sleeping with him. He said it himself you can’t cheat on someone you love...
Randomize
