11:03 p.m. Whats a lie i you lovn me. Let's cuddle.
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
i love beer. I convinced myself that I'm going to ace the exam tomorrow. I can't even do that when I actually study.
There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars
Sarah likes to play this game where she leaves her thongs at every party. she hides them where hopefully gf's will find them. I caught her naked from the waste down in my freezer this morning
He will. He has no choice. What's he gonna do? Find a better fuck buddy? We both know that's not possible. I'm the ideal friend with benefit. Minus snoring and uneven tits.
She was kinda cute. So long as you don't mind neck tattoos and bad life choices.
She just pored wine down the turkeys hole and said that she christened it like the whore that it is...happy thanksgiving.
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
What should I say back?
Well, how do you want the conversation to go?
Straight into my pants.
Did I, at any point last night, say I was dying?
I wore his All-American medal during sex. I came in first that night.
is that a dick in a sweater?
I cuddled with a man named Pickles
It was a strange night. I made out with his college roommate and said "do you care?" beforehand.
Randomize
