I'm sorry I'm just not ready to become vampire yet
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
Do you think if Santa was real that he's have a big penis?
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had a nursing patient tell me that her favorite drink was vodka and ensure...called it a colorado bulldog
she got kicked out of the bar for shoving german chocolate cake in the bartenders face. we were there less than a minute
Vegas is great, yelled at a guy 4 lanes over if he wanted a bj. ended up having sex in a vacant lot. I think he was homeless.
Happy you have kids and I don't day!
I had to puke in a ditch beside a cow pasture and like 50 cows just stood there and watched. I could feel the judgment.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We can stop fighting if you send me a picture of your dick standing at full attention wearing a sock.
I'll wait.
It can also be a hat.
You know what? The sex was so bad that I don't even care that I gave him strep.
It isn't about the beer pong. It is about the destruction of the patriarchy.
Saw a thong on the yellow lines of the street when I left this morning, are they yours by any chance?
The good news is I woke up fully clothed, on top of my covers, with a half eaten granola bar. So, breakfast was waiting for me and I’m already dressed and ready to go today.
If hypothetically I needed to puke on the bus... how would I go about doing this.
Randomize