drinking colt 45 because lando calrissian told me to
I puked last after eating a volcano taco and drinking vodka. I felt like a fucking dragon.
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
well most of my day revolves around power hour
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
I should start riding the bus again so I can drink all day
FACT: the parking lot attendant was yelling "NO SEX HERE! NO SEX" at yall.
Me either. I want to get 'chase a stray cat through the neighborhood in my hooker heels' drunk. And it's your birthday, so you have to get 'best friend holding your hair while you puke in the bar bathroom and cry about your life' drunk. In a feather boa.
It's okay though. My mom didn't believe that they were mine cuz they were magnums. Having a surprisingly large penis ftw
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
You put on a bike helmet, yelled "doesn't matter fuck it" then punched a stick the fire
You also spilled beer on my dog and tried to wipe it off with a paper towel but he kept getting away from you.
I thought my holiday spirit was gone this year until I got banged to Christmas music. It's back.
I s2g I’m about to get ghosted by a 34 yr old and my Oedipus complex cannot take it
Randomize