so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
Whose surfboard did we steal and why is there a wood carving of a pelican in the fridge where the beer used to be?
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
There are six slides. In going to pee in five of them. You have to guess which one to go down. Agree?
Agreed.
Remind me never to smoke before babysitting again. Ate an entire bottle of children's gummy vitamins.... not an easy thing to explain to parents.
If you can't seal the deal with her, I will. And you know I'll be successful. So there's your incentive
Pregnancy test = positive. Hope you still have our old guess who game 'cause daddy elimination begins now.
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
I'm pretty sure I just smoked a chunk of cat food. Thought it was something else. No reply needed.
Also, I found this app that is basically a tamagochi from the 90's and now I finally have something to keep me busy at work!
Remind me to tell you all about the topless girl on the street who attempted to taze me.
I grabbed the pretzel bag with my toes last night. I think that day of yoga had paid off.
The first thing you did was give us a tour of the house and showed us who was "on-limits" and "off-limits"
I just don't think it's that outlandish to ask that I don't get messages from my husband at 8:30pm on a Wednesday telling me he peed on our cat
Randomize
