I'm sorry for the crack den comment. You have a lovely apartment.
margarita scented body wash shouldn't be used the morning after cuervo. there should be a warning on the label.
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
the more i look through evidence of last night, the less i seem to remember.
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
its official. the only way for my hair to look good is to blow somebody
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
SHE GRABBED MY FULLY ERECT DICK IN A BAR AND STUCK HER TONGUE DOWN MY THROAT AND I COULD NOT CLOSE
I saw a kid peeing outback so I yelled "you have a small pecker, but its ok cuz when life gives you lemons..." and proceeded to throw lemons at him
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
I feel like at this point in my life I should be dating someone who doesn't run out of all his money on Mondays and have to wait til fridy to buy his weed
You have set the bar insurmountably high with apple pie and buttsex.
I just watched my mom pour beer into her vodka and drink it.
We're sort of like brothers. Except with more sexual tension. And we don't look alike. Or are related.
So we're not much like brothers really.
Randomize
