He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
you just used a box of cheese-its to get into the bar
maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
You now know someone who has just successfully talked his way out of being arrested for breaking into the town library at midnight. Ive been home for too long.
Shes been standing with her arms crossed in front of the mirror for 45 minutes...she told me she's "getting sober"
I have got to stop getting laid on my lunch breaks. I AM SO HUNGRY RIGHT NOW.
I think it says something about my life when I start picking up girls while im in rehab. And I don't think it's good.
Excuse me while I download incredibly disturbing porn until I'm more ashamed of myself than of my country.
didn't realize her mom was home while we were fucking, but she's oddly okay with it. she made us food afterwards. but then kept talking about having grand kids the whole time. is it time to bail?
I like to feed my guinea pigs before I get stoned. In case they get contact high and get the munchies. It's only polite.
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
I JUST LIKE FLANNEL, NOT VAGINAS! OK?
Why does your life consist of lesbians, black guys and cats?
If I hear you use the phrase "silky soft scrotum" one more time I swear to God you'll regret it
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
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