SEEEEXXX PLEASE
she pooed on me. she actually pooed on me.
Was it a mistake telling him I couldn't get the abortion until I was 2 months along on the first date?
how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He measures volume by how much weed he can put in it and surface area by how many people can have sex in it.
I was so high I thought there were pigeons in my room. Long story short there are now donut crumbs all around my bedroom.
Burnt my ear trying to use the bathroom blow dryer as a telephone.
I like to keep a steady black out going for the holidays. I feel it makes me less cynical
On Wednesday I'm putting wine in a water bottle and crashing Margaret thatchers funeral
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, I traded weed for crunch berries. Happy Thursday.
We got a lap dance! I touched a boob!
Never in a million years thought I would have to put jello shot recipe/equation into an excel spreadsheet
BRING KITTENS I AM A GENIUS
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.
It threw me off a little. I had to take a moment and ask myself, "Is he really fingering me in his mom's kitchen while I eat a whopper?"
Randomize