he wanted to give me a nickname... my choices were superjugs,godzilla boobs or mouth of fury
she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
Katy Perry is on a Proactiv commercial. That "I kissed a girl" shit is so much less hot now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just started drinking the sprite you used to ice your crotch last night. Missing you already
I ended up with a bullet proof vest and I still don't know his last name.
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
God fucking bless the man who invented the vibrator. Bless him and all his descendants. I think I saw the face of God tonight
My boobs just got me out of my third ticket last night
i'm so proud. i woke up to nearly seven feet of basketball player in my bed this morning
you win. again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Random pof guy just messaged me initiating a Pokemon battle. Want to be a bridesmaid?
Not all of us can be into hot dads. Some of us have to have commitment issues and be into musicians.
I got St Patrick's Day drunk on Friday and apparently ordered a Total Gym in the middle of the night
I was cock-blocked by a swat team last night.
I don't know which is weirder: that she was old enough to have a live-in son close to my age, or that the woman he was with was close to hers
Never make a coconut bikini from a real coconut.
I smell like old thai food.
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