Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
theres a difference between trying to make someone happy and letting them fuck you in the ass
I incognito puked under the VIP table. Did Jersey proud.
Remind me tomorrow to take that ball-gag out of my purse.
I took in his dog. My exboyfriend still calls me for 2 things, blow jobs and animal rescue. I need to end this cycle
So I walk in and he's teaching someone in London via Skype how to roll a blunt. I have new found respect for him.
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
Never thought I would be taunted by little kids about my walk of shame
Why did you fed-x me a peanut butter sandwich?
It seemed like the thing to do. There's popcorn on it too.
STOP smoking sooo much weed. Damn
Well after the shots I danced with a homeless guy, split my toe on broken glass, and had a 20 piece mcnugget. Who says postgrad life is boring.
I just realized I haven't had a date or a potential possibility of a date in about a year. Then I realized I wanted to actually go on a date. But I'm sitting here getting high instead of being at a party. Life.
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
Sitting on my couch watching TV in my underwear drinking a bottle of wine.... and you want to interrupt me to come pick you up. No I will not do it.
Randomize
