It took him longer to undo my bra than he lasted..
he was like a christmas ornament you would hang on the back of the tree....not great but still made the cut.
After we finished he asked if I knew if it was a boy or girl. Diet. Starts. Now.
I've decided to be proactive and make a sex playlist on my phone to avoid any awkward moments in my upcoming slutty summer
I had ketchup on my elbow and a random girl goes "I got it" and licked it off, only on game day
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
I'm going for high school drunk, you've got 15 minutes to get here.
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
Id prob hit it, but i instagram edited her picture to make her look better. Ha. She should fuck me just for that.
Then while I was crying on his shoulder, he got a boner. Soo. I kinda just hopped on.
Don't remember anything. Melissa just said I kept saying welcome to the bat cave
Do not try to steal a picnic table from a park, all you will end up with are sore arms and broken dreams.
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
He drank an entire six pack, past out on the guest bed, woke up around 4AM, lifted & dropped my leg, then peed on the corner of the bed. When I told him where he was pissing he said "it's all the same babe."
Randomize
