You don't think I'm weird or immature right?
No I think it's cute we had sex on your Bob the Builder sheets
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
My water bill is like twice the normal amount. I need a boyfriend.
Do I even want to know?
Awkward moment #23: reasuring mom that the bf and I aren't having sex as seamen is running down my leg...
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
On a totally unrelated note, captain four hour sexcapades lost it in his boxers this morning and tried to pretend it didnt happen. Lmao
Dude, did you know, your blood is contaminated with over 17 non-beer fluids?
If you find my purse on your yacht please call me - girl you slept with after yacht party
Get off me. I'm done. I want a cookie.
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted
He's a fucking ninja- think of the things he can probably do with his dick.
I know you would never do it--but if I ever walk into your house and find a "live love laugh" ANYTHING, I will commit you to an asylum. If it is a vinyl decal adhered to the wall, I will just smother you myself.
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