I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
I forgot how ruthlessly advertising works on me when I'm high.
we just did breakfast shots, I have a black eye and savage garden is on . Best weekend ever
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
I just found that video of you jumping onto my exercise ball feet-first and face-planting into my shoe rack.
i asked the cop if we could stop and do a chinese firedrill.... he said no.
You don't know how badly I want to just hold you as a soup spoon holds a bisque
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
Someone put a huge skyy vodka bottle in our washing machine. My roommate didn't see it and ran it. The washing machine split in two. #life
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
Went to 7-11 to buy condoms with the $20 I found on the ground outside Rite Aid. A good day for drug stores
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
If he doesn’t slap your ass with his drumsticks, then I don’t wanna hear about it.
Randomize
