its like he missed a chap in the "being a guy" handbook and read the bible instead
We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
only you would photoshop your dick
becoming an adult blows. i don't think its possible for me to wake up for anything that doesn't involve kegs and eggs or half naked bums passed out in our yard.
I'm sorry for throwing the cheese everywhere, but it wasn't my fault. No one was enforcing disipline so not really my fault for not behaving
I would like to apologize for my MANY attempts of trying to motor boat you.
who was wearing the fake mustache? I just found one in my cleavage
Someone spilled vodka all over the elevator floor. Bring straws.
i finally decided to cut him off after he he looked me dead in the eyes and said "how have i been inside you for the past twenty minutes when my pants are still on?"
What drink are we having for lunch?
Surely the maintenance men have seen worse than that condom right
I just had to explain to an 70+ year old lady what 'coitus' was. This was not in my job description.
I woke up with a dick pic from the ex-Mormon via email. Not really what I wanted to see before my first cup of coffee this morning, but I gotta say, I'm impressed.
the texts you sent will act as the rosetta stone for all drunk people
Are these your boobs on my camera?
Randomize
