i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
Hey man sorry I got all grabby
I'm having a chugging contest on the streetcar. The driver is judging.
Plus someone just passed me a joint through the window. BEST STREETCAR RIDE EVER
We don't need a hotel, we'll just sleep in the post office.
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
I need to shower, but I have no shower curtain... I think I can get by with a whore bath and a hat for one more day.
doing shots of $6 a bottle whiskey and chasing it with milk. my own personal way of saying fuck life.
You got a blow job by a girl whose nickname is "the terrible tooth"?! You are a brave man.
You rolled around on the floor, yelled about being a "half-zombie" and bit that guy on the leg who was hitting on me.
Nothing says summer like lemonaid, but nothing says fuck yeah summer like lemonaid and vodkavodka
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
The only downside to doctor sex is that getting choked with a stethoscope leaves marks.
Maybe you can just make seal noises during sex and we can call it good
Ok, now help me add to my topless picture collection, i'm going to make myself a calendar
So technically I made out with my second cousin this weekend... But it's by marriage and I'm adopted, so it's ok.
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