it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
i love that he's uncircumcised. it makes handjobs so much easier. it's the lazy susan of penises.
you know you made it when your beer pong table is made from imported italian hardwood
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
If the boyfriend of the drunk girl you just met asks her if she made a "special friend" you're going to have a threesome. For future reference.
These shoes are way too nice for a walk of shame. Its how I keep myself in line.
My contribution to the dinner party was a bottle of vodka and a bag of uncooked potatoes. I felt like a Russian serf.
Starting the weekend with a pair of pants on which the zipper wont stay up. Is this a sign of things to come??
I had very briefly met him a few years ago. My friend was tired of hearing us both complain about being horny. She figured she would fuck two birds with one stone.
Unfortunately hes not a hipster douchebag with no life goals, so naturally I'm not interested.
Everyone keeps telling me I look so healthy and happy today: the power of the penis people!!
I paper cut my nipple reading mail topless
69'd by candlelight when the power went out.
am drunk, naked, and blow drying cat. need adult supervision
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