Sometimes I wonder if we could be friends if we lived closer.
hey its robert, we just made out in the backyeard. i'm inside now and you should come to the bathroom and meet me.
I thought all girls wanted is to get a boner
you want to re-phrase that?
there are so many fish in the see you have left to fuck
At chipotle, there's a bachelorette party starting out the night here, i'm going to let you imagine what the bride to be looks like
I had a drunk dream I lived on a puppy farm. I hope this dream repeats every night of my life.
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
Ya,, he does have virgin eyes. Thats a real thing you know...
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
i just has to use a gift card to Target that one of my students parents got me to buy Plan B bc my bank account is -$0.08 so my 2017 is starting exactly how i pictured.
Never going back to jail again. Only time in my life I've ever had a wet dream about jerking it...
Randomize
