Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
well my last 2 orgasms were over shoe sales at macy's. what does that tell you?
just walked past a group of stoners who were staring open jawed in the spice aisle. tonight they will stumble upon something amazing.
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
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This is part your fault too. Don't tell me your dishes are unbreakable and not expect me to prove you wrong.
Im in mikes bed telling my vagina I'm sorry in advance.
You have to understand, he didn't so much come out of the closet as he backflipped out of it with an accompanying marching band.
Woke up with a text saying "when I get to see them titties again lil ma??" With 8 beads around my neck & an empty bottle of vodka in my arms.
I walked home with him, but I had to pee...so I did...as we walked. He was so drunk he didn't even notice. Good thing I was in a dress.
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My little brother found me on Instagram. If I'm not already the shame of my family, I'm about to be.
Def over. He sent me a nude selfie but cropped it right above his junk. Total Silence of the Fucking lambs looking.
found $100 my ex got arrested and I can receive free health insurance I gotta tell ya 2014 is really going to be my year
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
I wear drunk well.
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