I hate you, and I hope you have babies soon that you love very much. Then I will steal them and feed them to sharks, and you will be so heart broken that you never want to have any more kids and you'll just hide out in a dark room all day wondering how someone could feed another persons babies to sharks.
While my grandpa showed the family a slide show he accidentally included a topless photo of his new gf.
There comes a time in every girls life when she must use her boobs for good instead of evil.
Your pregnant arnt you
is that a crab cake on the shelf with the dvd's....?
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
the laptop wouldn't balance on his lap. that's how well endowed he is.
The gay viking and his eqyptian 'queen' hooked up on our couches. They pushed them together to make a bed. Innovative, but awkward to come home from work to at 7 am.
He knew exactly who I'd slept with after just one look at my crotch. He's like the Sherlock Holmes of cocks.
You kept going up to guys in plaid and screaming "are you a lumberjack" in their faces
Got laid at work. Yes, AT work, why they let me run this tennis center by myself speaks to their poor judge of character.
She came so hard that after she finished, she started a slow clap and then told me she pulled a muscle.
Thanks for bringing me tea/a bucket. You have earned yourself a face touch.
You'll be like the drunk Paul Bunyan someday with a giant grey cat
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
Baby Shark came on during sex.
She has BABY SHARK on her sex playlist. Who does that?
Randomize
