He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
We each get one free throw up cleaning, no questions asked.
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
GOOD NIGHT DREAM OF ALCOHOL SNO CONES
Apparently I took one a huge picture off the wall at the bar and was walking around dancing with it..
can we get vodka so I have an excuse for being an emotional wreck
is it weird that I didn't think he was hot last night when I was making out with him but right now I'm Facebook stalking him and think he's really attractive??
your beer goggles are on backwards.
Like fighting the continuous urge to sing Neil diamond "coming to America" kinda fucked up right now
You know I'm having a rough day when I'm curled up in the corner eating Spaghettios.
Someone has big plans this weekend. Just went to throw away the trash and saw packaging for 3 different vibrators on the top of the stack
That's MADAM THUNDERCUNT to you
Of course I fucked him. He was wearing a rainbow cock sock and cowboy boots.
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
My son's girlfriend just thanked me for having good penis genes.
Randomize
