it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
Oww! U thought rug burn was bad! Fuckin carseat burn hurts like a mother!!!
Wtf?
Use the slutty part of ur brain.
why is every porn film shot in the same house? with the same red couch!?!
his mom walked in while I was blowing him. he turned around in panic and accidentally punched me in the face. i have a black eye and only half the clothes i came here in. can you give me a ride?
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
mid puke you looked up at me and asked if it was your turn to sing
CAUTION: TWINS DO NOT HAVE TWIN PENISES.
I just found out my mom named me after her fake ID from college...
What's the appropriate I've been inside you but we're not technically dating valentines present?
Peeling duct tape off of my dick is definitely one of the stranger sensations that I've experienced.
this is definitely the first time I've ever had an orgasm and then had potatoes smeared on me within the same hour
I wish to strangle
whoa there darth vader
Just ate an entire BBQ chicken pizza this better go to my tits
I just broke into my house with a butter knife. It kinda scares me just how easy that was.
The weekend was a blur. There was vodka and penises and orgasms. I played a game of Cock Roulette and won big
Randomize
