Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
The woman exiting the men's room tried convincing me she was actually a good-looking man.
We made a trail of cheez balls so we knew how to get back to te apartment.
Are you in a cab?
I'm close- can you order me a bowl of vodka?
It was just a friend comforting a friend. Except his penis was inside of me.
dude, apparently i tried to force feed my grandma bananas last night.
You know, you have a good excuse now if you have a poor performance. Just say "what do you expect? I took a paintball to the DICK!!"
I can't wait till they start promoting the testiciplasty. Turn those old prunes into fresh tight kiwis!
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
That which doesn't kill you gives you an excuse to get shitfaced later
You know, we cock-blocked like 5 people last night. It's like we're her vagina goalies
LEAVE ME AND MY NIPPLES ALONE
So the next time I search for "Dragon Dildo" on my phone, I should probably clear the browser before handing my phone to someone and that's the first thing they see haha
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
Randomize
