Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
there is a polo shirt epidemic at this bar. also, im pretty sure i just saw the grown-up coppertone baby
I am currently trying to use a tide to go pen to remove the jizz from my backseat, it's not working...
she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
I just feel as thought we should spend the day in which we celebrate relationships the same as how we started them. Drunken hook ups.
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
She is high at the bar - she thinks the bottle of frangelico is aunt jemima telling her to stop doing drugs.
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE ASSHOLE WHO BREAKS OUT THE SHOTS
Still not sure if my open-bar-week-long-trip to Cuba is the best idea as a congratulations-for-my-sober-february-challenge. My liver might just explode and give up.
Just skate-of-shamed, shirtless, with a bucket or margaritas. Good luck beating that one.
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
He sent me a dick pic from work, but I could see all the pizzas in the background. Now I'm just hungry.
Tripping over coffee tables hurts shins but face is okay bc I landed on a sofa.
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
Randomize
