But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
if only i could text you this smell
I found a girl on our couch wearing lederhosen this mornig... I dont know if i should be impressed or ashamed
Tell her to not eat the pizza she threw up on.
He said he had bite marks on his back... Turns out he had to throw me over his shoulder, and I was really reluctant.
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
he ate me out like he was chugging a beer.
Setting up an obstacle course with ladders, hurdles, and a spring board to the pool. you down for drunk races through it later?
No, absolutely not. If you see that cunt, throw confetti or eggs at her.
That's a pretty extreme jump from confetti to eggs
I'm in too deep with Breaking Bad. I realized I've altered my Tinder likes to people that either look like Jesse or work in a school's Science department.
This dude has batman tighty whities on over his cargo pants and he has the nerve to yell "fuck you bitch" up at my window.
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
besides the unzipped fly, the black eye and the toilet paper on your shoe you looked really sexy today baby!
Randomize
