you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
Well I'm going to a gay club in my banana suit. You should come. My bro is going as a pirate. I don't know if there's a theme.
Do you think I can haggle my way to discounted weed on 4.21?
Don't text me when you know I'm doing lines on my phone
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
tried to order jimmy johns from the ER last night, the nurses did nottt approve
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
I feel like a fucked a broomstick last night. You get a gold star.
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
We were in the hot tub...he ate the pizza pocket directly out of my mouth
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I fill condoms, not promises.
The uberlube is also flammable
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
I love getting kicked out of places. Its like winning a little league game
Yeah she let me pull the goalie and wear my USA flag like a cape since it was the first day of the world cup
Probably won't be invited back there again considering last time his purebred corgi ate my pot brownie and had to be rushed to the hospital.
Randomize