omg. I had the wrong window open and I accidentaly posted my credit card # on twitter
Whats your twitter name
At Coney Island the sign for the rollercoaster The Cyclone says, "Make sure your glasses and weave are secure."
i dont think my boyfriend knows how much of a pain it is to shave my ass
your address is 607B right?
yeah why?
i need to tell the guy bringing over the flaming bag of dog shit where to put it
Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
Please tell me nicole sent the picture of the ejaculating penis to you too, otherwise I'll feel really awkward
you're asking me why i keep burn ointment in my purse.... do you really want to know the answer to that question?
My goal for break? Fuck all my exes in reverse order.
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
The bartender has no bra and is giving out free shots. Call mom I'm getting married.
I sense lesbianism
That's a weird power
I have filthy fantasies involving his tongue. My vagina almost exploded while he was licking that ice cream cone.
Remember when you laughed that I downloaded a “fireplace” station on my Roku? I just woke up butt naked on my couch with my fireplace station playing. So there, guess that shows you. Now excuse me while I go back to sleep in front of my fireplace.
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