Just used a champagne bottle to outline a trigonometric circle for math 104.. should i give up on life now or later?
tequila makes me forget i have legs
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
Right, because I totally see myself driving all the way down there to fuck his world famous penis.
The TA leading my study session just said "now get outta here. I need to get drunk before class"
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
I just want you to know that we eye fucked the shit out of someone who just got drafted
I just did something so unspeakable in the panera bathroom that their health score dropped 10 points.
Jumanji is 1000% better stoned while cooking breakfast.
I wrapped my scarf around his head and then made him go down on me
And I also said, "probe me"
You were spooning an empty magnum of white wine in the middle of the bed so I slept on the couch
Well at least there's no more confusion about your place in my life. Wine > pizza > your dick > the rest of you.
Love you...
I just want a simple guy who likes cats, tattoos, and doing coke off my tits.
I'm done, I have no more memes or ways to ask for nudes, so yeah
Slammed 3 beers and just bowled a 129\nI guess alcohol IS the answer
Some guy just walked past the bus stop in a lab coat and with a samurai sword and case...
Randomize
