he took off his pants and apologized in advance if I thought he was too small.
Hungover Fun Fact #4: Eating a grilled stuffed burrito WILL make you blow chunks in the ice maker at work.
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me.
Responsibility: Hiding your beer when your DWI clients who are out on bond come to talk to you at bars.
this is terrible I feel like i'm trapped in a cage with a wild republican
He laid on the ground 100 ft from the car crying about how he just wanted to be home already
Jimmy johns delivers to the bar behind work. Happy vodka day!
I asked him if we were going to get arrested for doing it in the bar parking lot. "Absolutly not" said the guy getting the blow job...
His parents came home, and now I'm hiding in a closet; awaiting death at dawn.
You are always hiding in a closet though??
We got really excited for country fried steak then we had sex.
its times like this i wish i didnt have a penis
When do you estimate your next shower will be? Several people have asked.
I know... It's stupid... It's like, I have sex with his brother and bestfriend ONE time....
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
Randomize
