Help i just walked in on mom blowing dad
office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
you were so drunk you slurred your pauses
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
We woke up under the ping pong table holding hands.
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
When we were done making out, some guy ran into the room yelling, "I'll save you Brandon! I'll save you!"
aha we'll just say that my mind was so focused on A Bugs Life that it was hard to maintain an erection
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
Let me be the vehicle for you to live out your slutty half-gay dreams.
Just got a Lifeproof case for Christmas so hold on and tell me how my shower nudes look
I swear to god if I have to repeat this to you one more mother fucking time I will flip fucking shit and acidic rain will pour down upon your mother fucking soul
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
You couldn’t remember the word hand jibber. Instead, your drunk ass offered the bartenders “unlimited hand fritters” if they wouldn’t cut you off.
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