TRUE LIFE: my roommate is growing a bush.
better yet, TRUE LIFE: my roommates boyfriend begged her to grow a bush.
The story about him having a girlfriend changed real fast when he found out that I was a gymnast
We found you on the floor drooling you kept saying over and over how you were double jointed.
Look, if he's not the brother with three nipples, I'm just not interested.
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
But seriously he was like a god with his hands. My vagina feels annointed.
I woke up with a half eaten bag of lettuce in my hand, wearing my Halloween costume from last year. Damn you tequila.
I'm imagining a seal in an ugly shirt hahahahaha Percocet
He made me put my cow print vest and my cowboy hat from my ' sheriff woody' costume and said I'll show you a woody. What I charmer huh!? I love make up sex
Mostly what I remember is someone saying "raise your hand if you're too turnt" then raising my hand and falling
I got with him in my watermelon costume so ya you owe me $1
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
Secrets from the porn industry: liTERALLY SHOVE A SEA SPONGE UP YOUR VAGINA GO ON DO IT
She tried to fuck me right at the bar in front of everyone. She actually got my pants unzipped before I realized what was going on.
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