Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
I had to use the resin knife to take the staples out of my tax return forms. Tax returns and a search warrant?
But like now everytime I pee I just think... wow I had sex with him on this toilet.
She was crying, alone at a college bar. It would have been rude NOT to try and show my penis to her.
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
You should probably stop your little brother from ruining thanksgiving. I just caught him trying to stuff a cake in a drawer... And now he's puking.
"Stranger danger aquaman" were the last words i remember. help me.
I don't know. She kept pirouetting across the kitchen while making dinner. I just sat there stoned.
In my drunk state I was like I ONLY HAD SEX WITH SOMEONE ELSE BECAUSE HE WAS THE HOTTEST GUY IVE EVER EVEN SEEN
Forced to cancel my booty call due to the snowpocalypse. This crosses the line.
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
I came twice and when I was done I petted his head and said "you did good kid you did good" and just laid back smiling. Tell me I'm not awesome.
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