Happy Easter!!!
I'm an idiot
i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
just found a sign outside my brothers door "not going to church, don't even try" and he is covered is vomit in his bed.
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
I hid drinks in her bathroom closet.... like a squirrel... a squirrel who knew she was going to get cut off soon
I just realized my life is a timeline of drunken injuries.
gladiator or hannah montana?
This is why I never have to ask who you are when I get a new phone.
Stop leaving me alone with my ex boyfriends after keg challenges. Woke up in his bed covered in what you think would be cum. No...toothpaste. He left a note. "Be home at four. Don't be here when I get back."
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
American Eric just peed on us from the second floor. Hes now very confused as to why his "toilet is yelling." Send help.
she hacked my macbook and downloaded an illegal version of the original pokemon red, completely nude in my computer chair. there were several levels of hornyness existing all at once
Is it bad I have to get shitty ass drunk on a Monday night because I can't adult?
You showed up at my house at 4am with a bloody nose, one shoe and a bucket of chicken... I live no where near a place that sells chicken in a bucket..
Well that would explain the bones in my purse.
I haven’t sent any nudes yet in 2018.
That’s not true...is it?
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