and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
I just saw a man vacuming his front lawn. What is this world coming to?
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
I just saw at least a dozen senior citizens on roller blades. way to drunk for this.
I jerked him off and then punched him in the face for no reason. Typical evening drinking Sailor Jerry's.
I just threw up again because I opened my eyes... God is laughing. I resorted to taking the Mexican Dramamine because I feel seasick from walking. Not helping.
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
I'm putting my hangover kit in my car for the trip to work tomorrow morning. Dedication
Smoked a blunt with my dad then introduced him to cinnabon delights. Today was a good day.
Tune in tm morning for how to buy Plan B in a foreign country while coming down off ecstasy
I think it may be easier if I stay drunk/high til the wedding. You game?
It's confirmed. I have two dates on Saturday, and they are both named Mike.
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
Randomize
