guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
Dan just whipped out his wang to piss in a milk jug! Hello weekend.
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
Not only did a random toaster end up in my house last night, it's also full of skittles.
keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
You take your time. Wallowing in last nights filth is the best way to get over a hangover
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
The cop actually kicked the bitches out of the cab so we could get ours. I flipped them all off as the door was shutting. That drunk.
They kept barging in on us saying random shit. At one point they came in yelling room service! and threw soda at us bruising my foot. Weirdest injury I have gotten during sex.
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
There it is. Caramel-coated dick. Someone is getting a yeast infection later.
i don't like interrupting booty calls. thats just rude.
Randomize
