I just sold weed to a guy holding a baby...does this make me a bad person?
Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
There is an empty space on my boobs where glow paint should be.
They have 12 kegs and 40 bottles of liquor and a pool with a diving board. And hardly anyone at this wedding knows me. Should be a great night
I'm getting shit face wasted, and I have to be up so early tomorrow. I am bad at smart.
Drunbk and roasting marshmallows on my stove. Accidentally singed the catr's fur but she'sd alright.
I woke up with a pinecone in my hair. A full pine cone.
This weekend i learned three things 1) skittles in vodka is good 2) it takes more than a roll of quarters to get a cab home 3) never tell a bartender to give you your change in actual change
Watching the wiggles while tripping on acid is the scariest fucking thing of all time
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
You can't die you're my only democrat family member
That’s true love. If they recognize a chocolate mold of your anus.
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
Randomize
