just walked by a lingerie store, the sign out front, "Specials for Father's Day", in no way is that just not wrong.
Only you could manage to look like a complete slut while wearing a turtle neck.
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
if you hear someone banging on your door early in the morning, it's me with some breakfast burritos, so don't be alarmed
I mean, I know they're ugly, but I cant turn down a birthday threesome.
how you manage to cockblock me from 500 miles away still baffles me.
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
I feel like getting drunk at the airport is sort of a rite of passage into adulthood, but maybe i should reserve that occasion for a flight thats not just 1 hr
Worst walk of shame man. They had a fire drill at 7am, had to walk out of her all girl dorm wearing my Everday I'm Hustling sweater
You're the best friend ever. I wouldn't want to do the walk of shame with anyone else.
you never un-have a 4some
Im going to seductively wisper "that butters my biscuit" in your ear
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
No no. Thank you. Killed multiple birds with one penis.
It was funny for a while but 3 days later I still can't walk and I've constructed a diaper-like contraption to hold the ice pack on my vagina.
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