just bought miller high life, hungry man dinners, and a bottle of lube. you win life, you win.
YOU CAN MICROWAVE POPTARTS!?!??!
The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
love makes seman taste better
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
stuck in the elevator with that hot guy from the 3rd flood. Worried he can smell my spray tan and desperation
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
Remember when we pinky swore we'd never feel hungover alone...
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
Either your boy toy or the kid who pulled a knife on me in high school is here
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
You grabbed your house keys, threw them at the door and asked, "did it open?"
Just met my French neighbor. We watched a crow die together, so we're pretty tight.
It's only 10am and I doubt my day could get much worse. During my 9am meeting I had to sit between my boss who I fucked for my promotion and the guy he walked in on me fucking on the copier
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
Randomize
