i either just vomited on a lesbian or a small boy
Could you explain why there is an Australian passport in your toilet?
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
I just realized I have yet to puke in your new apartment. Clearly we're doing something wrong. On my way over with Cuervo as I type.
I just watched a guy smoke weed through a French Horn. He is my hero
Your cock deserves a montage
Let's get drunk and go to Walmart and just tackle people at random.
Why didn't you tell me I was calling her by her sisters name all night?
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
We need a full length mirror. I just ate it trying to look at my shoes on the toilet. But aside from a arm bruise I'm good to go
I feel better now, I have multiple fuck buddies again
If anything I look like a soccor mom going out for her annual ladies night. Trying hard, but not quite in her twenty's anymore.
I feel like ditching all logic and responsibility and get shit-faced before the week's over. Thoughts?
Met this british guy. Played pool. Broke into an apartment and had sex
Randomize
