Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
If we're like this now and women reach their sexual peak in their 30's, I can't even fathom what our futures hold.
Saying he's good in bed would be like saying Soulja Boy is a good rapper, completely unlogical if you've heard him.
I was just on craigslist and saw and ad for a naked yoga instructor. I will no longer be jobless.
someone lit off fireworks while I puked in the street. I was like congratulating me for making it through homecoming.
We almost died tonight..we almost die every night. but tonight was the closest by far
I just threw up blood. Also i just remembered i got hit in the face with a 2 by 4.
So a guy died and our dates revived him with CPR. Good night?
I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty.
Signs of a stoner: trying everything in your fridge topped with peanut butter to seek satisfaction.
So the dog chewed my vibrator last night. It added a nice new texture actually.
My phone autocorrected "shhhhh" to "AHHHHHHHHH" and I feel like that says a lot about my life
yes, i'm a douce. but i'm a high quality douche.
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
Convinced if I was being murdered in my house no one would come and save me. If no one heard my 10000000 orgasms last night, there is no hope.
Randomize
